His name was unusual and incomplete. Julaybib (Radhi Allaahu Anhu) means “small grown” being the diminutive form of the word “Jalbab.” The name is an indication that Julaybib was small and short, even of dwarf-like stature. More than that, he is described as being “damim” which means ugly, deformed, or of repulsive appearance. Even more disturbing, for the society in which he lived, Julaybib’s lineage was not known. There is no record of who his mother of his father was or to what tribe he belonged. This was a grave disability in the society in which he lived. Julaybib could not expect any compassion or help, any protection or support from a society that placed a great deal of importance on family and tribal connections. In this regard, all that was known of him was that he was an Arab and that, as far as the new community of Islam was concerned, he was one of the Ansar. Perhaps he belonged to one of the outlying tribes beyond Madinah and had drifted into the city or he could have even been from among the Ansar of the city itself.
The disabilities under which Julaybib lived would have been enough to have him ridiculed and shunned in any society and in fact he was prohibited by one person, a certain Abu Barzah of the Aslam tribe, from entering his home. He once told his wife: “Do not let Julaybib enter among you. If he does, I shall certainly do (something terrible to him).” Probably because he was teased and scoffed at in the company of men, Julaybib used to take refuge in the company of women. Was there any hope of Julaybib being treated with respect and consideration? Was there any hope of his finding emotional satisfaction as an individual and as a man? Was there any hope of his enjoying the relationships which others take for granted? And in the society emerging under the guidance of the Prophet, was he so insignificant as to be overlooked in the preoccupation with the great affairs of the state and in the supreme issues of life and survival which constantly engaged the attention of the Prophet?
Just as he was aware of the great issues of life and destiny, the Prophet of Mercy (Sallalaahu Alaihi wa Sallam) was also aware of the needs and sensibilities of his most humble companions. With Julaybib in mind, the Prophet (Sallalaahu Alaihi wa Sallam) went to one of the Ansar and said: “I want to have your daughter married.” “How wonderful and blessed, O Messenger of Allah and what a delight to the eye (this would be),” replied the Ansari man with obvious joy and happiness. “I do not want her for myself,” added the Prophet (Sallalaahu Alaihi wa Sallam). “Then for whom, O Messenger of Allah?” asked the man, obviously somewhat let down. “For Julaybib,” said the Prophet. The Ansari must have been too shocked to give his own reaction and he merely said: “I will consult with her mother.” And off he went to his wife. “The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, wants to have your daughter married,” he said to her. She too was thrilled. “What a wonderful idea and what a delight to the eye (this would be),” she said. “He does not want to marry her himself but he wants to marry her to Julaybib,” he added. She was flabbergasted.
“To Julaybib! No, never to Julaybib! No, by Allah, we shall not marry (her) to him,” she protested. As the Ansari was about to return to the Prophet (Sallalaahu Alaihi wa Sallam) to inform him of what his wife had said, the daughter who had heard her mother’s protestations, asked: “Who has asked you to marry me?” Her mother told her of the Prophet’s request for her hand in marriage to Julaybib. When she heard that the request had come from the Prophet (Sallalaahu Alaihi wa Sallam) and that her mother was absolutely opposed to the idea, she was greatly perturbed and said: “Do you refuse the request of the Messenger of Allah? Send me to him for he shall certainly not bring ruin to me.” This was the reply of a truly great person who had a clear understanding of what was required of her as a Muslim. What greater satisfaction and fulfillment can a Muslim find than in responding willingly to the requests and commands of the Messenger of Allah! No doubt, this companion of the Prophet, whose name we do not even know had heard the verse of the Quran:
“It is not for a believer, man or woman, when Allah and His Messenger have decreed a matter that they should have any option in their decision. And whoever disobeys Allah and His Messenger, he has indeed strayed in a plain error.” (The Qur’an, Surah al-Ahzab, 33:36)
This verse was revealed in connection with the marriage of Zaynab bint Jahsh and Zayd ibn al-Harithah which was arranged by the Prophet (Sallalaahu Alaihi wa Sallam) to show the egalitarian spirit of Islam. Zaynab at first was highly offended at the thought of marrying Zayd a former slave and refused to do so. The Prophet prevailed upon them both and they were married. The marriage however ended in divorce and Zaynab was eventually married to the Prophet (Sallalaahu Alaihi wa Sallam) himself. It is said that the Ansari girl read the verse to her parents and said: “I am satisfied and submit myself to whatever the Messenger of Allah deems good for me.” The Prophet (Sallalaahu Alaihi wa Sallam) heard of her reaction and prayed for her: “O Lord, bestow good on her in abundance and make not her life one of toil and trouble.” Among the Ansaar, it is said that there was not a more eligible bride than she. She was married by the Prophet to Julaybib and they lived together until he was killed.
And how was Julaybib killed? He went on an expedition with the Prophet (Sallalaahu Alaihi wa Sallam), peace be upon him, and an encounter with some mushrikin (polytheists) ensued. When the battle was over, the Prophet (Sallalaahu Alaihi wa Sallam) asked his companions: “Have you lost anyone?” They replied giving the names of their relatives or close friends who were killed. He put the same questions to other companions and they also named the ones they had lost in the battle. Another group answered that they had lost no close relatives whereupon the Prophet (Sallalaahu Alaihi wa Sallam) said: “But I have lost Julaybib. Search for him in the battlefield.” They searched and found him beside seven mushrikin whom he had struck before meeting his end. The Prophet (Sallalaahu Alaihi wa Sallam) stood up and went to the spot where Julaybib, his short and deformed companion, lay. He stood over him and said: “He killed seven and then was killed? This (man) is of me and I am of him.” He repeated this two or three times. The Prophet (Sallalaahu Alaihi wa Sallam) then took him in his arms and it is said that he had no better bed besides the forearms of the Messenger of Allah. The Prophet (Sallalaahu Alaihi wa Sallam) then dug for him a grave and himself placed him in it. He did not wash him for martyrs and not washed before burial.
Julaybib and his wife are not usually among the Companions of the Prophet whose deeds are sung and whose exploits are recounted with reverence and admiration as they should be. But in the meagre facts that are known about them and which have here been recounted we see how humble human beings were given hope and dignity by the Prophet (Sallalaahu Alaihi wa Sallam) where once they was only despair and self-debasement. The attitude of the unknown and unnamed Ansari girl who readily agreed to be the wife of a physically unattractive man was an attitude which reflected a profound understanding of Islam. It reflected on her path the effacement of personal desires and preferences even when she could have counted on the support of her parents. It reflected on her part a total disregard for social pressures. It reflected above all a ready and implicit confidence in the wisdom and authority of the Prophet (Sallalaahu Alaihi wa Sallam) in submitting herself to whatever he deemed good. This is the attitude of the true believer.
In Julaybib, there is the example of a person who was almost regarded as a social outcast because of his appearance. Given help, confidence and encouragement by the noble Prophet, he was able to perform acts of courage and make the supreme sacrifice and deserve the commendation of the Prophet: “He is of me and I am of him.”
Transcribed from: Da’wah Publications, Issue #7, July 2008
Sahih Muslim Book 031, Number 6045:
Abu Barza reported that Allah’s Apostle (may peace be upon him) was there in a battlefield that Allah conferred upon him the spoils of war. He said to his Companions: Is anyone missing amongst you? They said: So and so and so. He again said: Is there anyone missing amongst you? They said: So and so and so. He then said: Is there anyone missing amongst you? They said: No. Thereupon he (the Holy Prophet) said: But I am missing Julaibib. They (his Companions) searched him amongst those who had been killed and they found him by the side of seven (dead bodies) whom he had killed and he had been killed (by the oppoments). Allah’s Apostle (may peace be upon him) came there and stood (by his side) and said: He killed seven (persons). Then (his opponents) killed him. He is mine and I am his. He then placed him upon his hands and there was none else to lift but Allah’s Apostle (may peace be upon him). Then the grave was dug for him and he was placed in the grave and no mention is made of a bath.
The following is from Tafseer Ibn Kathir
33. Surah Al-Ahzab
Imam Ahmad recorded that Abu Barzah Al-Aslami said: “Julaybib was a man who used to enter upon women and joke with them. I said to my wife, `Do not let Julaybib enter upon you, for if he enters upon you I shall do such and such.’ If any of the Ansar had a single female relative, they would not arrange a marriage for her until they found out whether the Prophet wanted to marry her or not. The Prophet said to one of the Ansar:
(Give me your daughter for marriage.) He said, `Yes, O Messenger of Allah, it would be an honor and a blessing.’ He said,
«إِنِّي لَسْتُ أُرِيدُهَا لِنَفْسِي»
(I do not want her for myself.) He said, `Then for whom, O Messenger of Allah’ He said,
(For Julaybib.) He said, `O Messenger of Allah, let me consult her mother.’ So he went to the girl’s mother and said, `The Messenger of Allah is proposing marriage for your daughter.’ She said, `Yes, it would be a pleasure.’ He said, `He is not proposing to marry her himself, he is proposing on behalf of Julaybib.’ She said, `What! Julaybib No, by Allah, we will not marry her to him.’ When he wanted to get up and go to the Messenger of Allah to tell him what the girl’s mother had said, the girl asked, `Who is asking for my hand’ So her mother told her, and she said, `Are you refusing to follow the command of the Messenger of Allah Follow his command, for I will not come to any harm.’ So her father went to the Messenger of Allah and said, `Deal with her as you wish.’ So he married her to Julaybib. Then the Messenger of Allah went out on one of his military campaigns, and after Allah had granted him victory, he said to his Companions, may Allah be pleased with them,
«هَلْ تَفْقِدُونَ مِنْ أَحَد»
(See whether there is anybody missing.) They said, `We have lost so-and-so, and so-and-so.’ He said,
«انْظُرُوا هَلْ تَفْقِدُونَ مِنْ أَحَد»
(See if there is anybody missing.) They said, `No one.’ He said:
«لَكِنَّنِي أَفْقِدُ جُلَيْبِيبًا»
(But I see that Julaybib is missing.) He said:
«فَاطْلُبُوهُ فِي الْقَتْلَى»
(Go and look for him among the dead.) So they looked for him, and found him beside seven of the enemy whom he had killed before he was himself killed. They said, `O Messenger of Allah, here he is, beside seven of the enemy whom he had killed before he was himself killed.’ The Messenger of Allah came and stood beside him and said,
«قَتَلَ سَبْعَةً وَقَتَلُوهُ، هَذَا مِنِّي وَأَنَا مِنْه»
(He killed seven before he was himself killed. He belongs to me and I belong to him.) He said this two or three times, then the Messenger of Allah carried him in his arms and held him while his grave was dug, then he placed him in his grave. It was not mentioned that he washed him, may Allah be pleased with him.” Thabit, may Allah be pleased with him, said: “There was no widow among the Ansar who was more sought after for marriage than that girl.” Ishaq bin `Abdullah bin Abi Talhah asked Thabit, “Do you know how the Messenger of Allah prayed for that girl” He told him: “He said,
«اللَّهُمَّ صُبَّ عَلَيْهَا الْخَيْرَ صَبًّا وَلَا تَجْعَلْ عَيْشَهَا كَدًّا»
(O Allah, pour blessings upon her and do not make her life hard.) And this is how it was; there was no widow among the Ansar who was more sought after for marriage than her.” This is how it was recorded by Imam Ahmad, in full.
[Listen to this 15 min inspirational story @ http://salaf-us-saalih.com/2015/08/26/ittibah-and-the-story-of-julaibeeb/]