Kind Treatment towards Parents and establishment of the ties of BloodRelationship

Imam Al-Nawawi’s Riyad-us-Saliheen
Chapter 40
Kind Treatment towards Parents and establishment of the ties of Blood
Relationship

Allah, the Exalted, says:

“Worship Allah and join none with Him (in worship); and do good to parents, kinsfolk, orphans, Al-Masakin (the poor), the neighbour who is near of kin, the neighbour who is a stranger, the companion by your side, the wayfarer (you meet), and those (slaves) whom your right hands possess”. (4:36)

“And fear Allah through Whom you demand (your mutual rights), and (do not cut the relations of) the wombs (kinship)”. (4:1)

“And those who join that which Allah has commanded to be joined (i.e., they are good to their relatives and do not sever the bond of kinship)”. (13:21)

“And we have enjoined on man to be good and dutiful to his parents”. (29:8)

“And your Rubb has decreed that you worship none but Him. And that you be dutiful to your parents. If one of them or both of them attain old age in your life, say not to them a word of disrespect, nor shout at them but address them in terms of honour. And lower unto them the wing of submission and humility through mercy, and say: `My Rubb! Bestow on them Your Mercy as they did bring me up when I was young”. (17:23,24)

“And We have enjoined on man (to be dutiful and good) to his parents. His mother bore him in weakness and hardship upon weakness and hardship, and his weaning is in two years- give thanks to Me and to your parents”. (31:14)

312. `Abdullah bin Mas`ud (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: I asked the Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) , “Which of the deeds is loved most by Allah?” Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, “Salat at its proper time.” I asked, “What next?” He (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) replied, “Kindness to parents.” I asked, “What next?” He replied, “Jihad in the way of Allah.”
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

313. Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, “No son can repay (the kindness shown by his father) unless he finds him a slave and buys him and emancipates him”.
[Muslim].

314. Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, “He who believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him be hospitable to his guest; and he who believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him maintain good the ties of blood relationship; and he who believes in Allah and the Last Day, must speak good or remain silent”.
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

315.  Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, “Allah created all the creatures and when He finished the task of His creation, Ar-Rahm (ties of relationship) said: `(O Allah) at this place I seek refuge with You against severing my ties.’ Allah said: `That I treat with kindness those who treat you with kindness and sever ties with those who sever ties with you.’ It said: `I am satisfied.’ Allah said: `Then this is yours”. Then Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, “Recite this Ayah if you like: `Would you then, if you were given the authority, do mischief in the land, and sever your ties of kinship? Such are they whom Allah has cursed, so that He has made them deaf and blinded their sight”. (47:22,23).
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

The words in Al-Bukhari are: Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, “Allah (SWT) says: `He who maintains good ties with you, I maintain good ties with him; and he who severs your ties, I sever ties with him”.

316. Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: A person came to Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) and asked, “Who among people is most deserving of my fine treatment?” He (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, “Your mother”. He again asked, “Who next?” “Your mother”, the Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) replied again. He asked, “Who next?” He (the Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam)) said again, “Your mother.” He again asked, “Then who?” Thereupon he (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said,” Then your father.”

In another narration: “O Messenger of Allah! Who is most deserving of my fine treatment?” He (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, “Your mother, then your mother, then your mother, then your father, then your nearest, then nearest”.
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

317. Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: The Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, “May he be disgraced! May he be disgraced! May he be disgraced, whose parents, one or both, attain old age during his life time, and he does not enter Jannah (by rendering being dutiful to them)”.
[Muslim].

318. Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: A man said to Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam): “I have relatives with whom I try to keep the ties of relationship but they sever relations with me; and whom I treat kindly but they treat me badly, I am gentle with them but they are rough to me.” He (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) replied, “If you are as you say, it is as if you are feeding them hot ashes, and you will be with a supporter against them from Allah as long as you continue to do so”.
[Muslim].

319. Anas (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, “He who desires ample provisions and his life be prolonged, should maintain good ties with his blood relations”. [Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

320. Anas (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Abu Talhah (May Allah be pleased with him) was the richest among the Ansar of Al-Madinah and possessed the largest property; and among his possessions what he loved most was his garden known as Bairuha’ which was opposite the mosque, and Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) often visited it and drank from its fresh water. When this ayah was revealed: “By no means shall you attain Al-Birr (piety, righteousness – here it means Allah’s reward, i.e., Jannah), unless you spend (in Allah’s Cause) of that which you love,” (3:92). Abu Talhah came to Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam), and said: “Allah says in His Book: `By no means shall you attain Al-Birr, unless you spend (in Allah’s Cause) of that which you love,‘ and the dearest of my property is Bairuha’ so I have given it as Sadaqah (charity) for Allah’s sake, and I anticipate its reward with Him; so spend it, O Messenger of Allah, as Allah guides you”. Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, “Well-done! That is profitable property. I have heard what you have said, but I think you should spend it on your nearest relatives.” So Abu Talhah distributed it among his nearest relatives and cousins.
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

321. `Abdullah bin `Amr bin Al-`as (May Allah be pleased with them) reported: A man came to the Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) of Allah and said, “I swear allegiance to you for emigration and Jihad, seeking reward from Allah.” He (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, “Is any of your parents alive?” He said, “Yes, both of them are alive.” He (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) then asked, “Do you want to seek reward from Allah?” He replied in the affirmative. Thereupon Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, “Go back to your parents and keep good company with them”.
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

In another narration it is reported that a person came to Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) and sought his permission to participate in Jihad. The Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) asked, “Are your parents alive?” He replied in the affirmative. The Prophet a(sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, “(You should) consider their service as Jihad.”

322. `Abdullah bin `Amr Al-`as (May Allah be pleased with them) reported: The Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, “The person who perfectly maintains the ties of kinship is not the one who does it because he gets recompensed by his relatives (for being kind and good to them), but the one who truly maintains the bonds of kinship is the one who persists in doing so even though the latter has severed the ties of kinship with him”.
[Al-Bukhari].

323. `Aishah (May Allah be pleased with her) reported: Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, “The bond of relationship is suspending from the Throne, and says: `He who keeps good relations with me, Allah will keep connection with him, but whosoever severs relations with me, Allah will sever connection with him”.
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

324. It has been narrated that Maimuna bint Al-Harith (May Allah be pleased with her) had set free a slave-girl without the Prophet’s permission. When her turn came (the Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam)  used to visit his wives in turns), she made mention of that to him saying, “Did you know I have set slave-girl free?” He said, “Have you, indeed?” She replied, “Yes”. He (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) then remarked, “Had you given her to your maternal uncles, you would have your reward increased”.
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

325. Asma’ bint Abu Bakr As-Siddiq (May Allah be pleased with her) said: My mother came to me while she was still a polytheist, so I asked Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam), “My mother, who is ill-disposed to Islam, has come to visit me. Shall I maintain relations with her?” He (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) replied, “Yes, maintain relations with your mother”.
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

326. Zainab Ath-Thaqafiyah (May Allah be pleased with her) the wife of `Abdullah bin Mas`ud (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: When Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) told the women that they should give Sadaqah (charity), even if it should be some of their jewellery, I returned to `Abdullah bin Mas`ud and said, “You are a man who does not possess much, and Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) has commanded us to give Sadaqah. So go and ask him if giving to you will serve the purpose; otherwise, I shall give it to someone else.” He asked me that I should better go myself. I went and found a woman of the Ansar at the door of Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam), waiting to ask a similar question as mine. The Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) was endowed with dignity, and so we could not go in. When Bilal (May Allah be pleased with him) came out to us, we said to him: “Go to Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) and tell him that there are two women at the door who have come to ask him whether it will serve them to give Sadaqah to their husbands and to orphans who are in their charge, but do not tell him who we are. Bilal (May Allah be pleased with him) went in and asked him, and Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) asked him who the women were. When he told him that they were a woman of the Ansar and Zainab, he asked him which Zainab it was, and when he was told it was the wife of `Abdullah bin Mas`ud, he (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, “They will have a double reward, one for maintaining the ties of kinship and another for Sadaqah”.
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

327. Abu Sufyan Sakhr bin Harb (May Allah be pleased with him) mentioned Heraclius in a long Hadith and said: Heraclius asked me, “What does this Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) teach you?” I said, “He orders us to worship Allah Alone and not to associate a thing with Him in worship, to discard what our ancestors said, to perform the Salat (prayer), speak the truth, and maintain the ties of kinship”.
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

328. Abu Dharr (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, “You will soon conquer a land where people deal with Qirat.”

 And according to another version: Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, “You will soon conquer Egypt where Al-Qirat is frequently mentioned. So when you conquer it, treat its inhabitants well. For there lies upon you the responsibility because of blood ties or relationship (with them)”.
[Muslim].

329. Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: When this Verse was revealed: “And warn your tribe (O Muhammad (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam)) of near kindred”. (26:214) Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) called the Quraish; when they gathered, he said to them: “O sons of `Abd Shams; O sons of Ka`b bin Lu’ai, rescue yourselves from the Fire! O sons of Murrah bin Ka`b, rescue yourselves from the Fire! O sons of `Abd Manaf, rescue yourselves from the Fire! O sons of `Abdul-Muttalib, rescue yourselves from the Fire! O Fatimah, rescue yourself from the Fire, for I have no power (to protect you) from Allah in anything except that I would sustain relationship with you”.
[Muslim].

330. Abu Abdullah `Amr bin Al-`as (May Allah be pleased with them) said: I heard Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) saying openly not secretly, “The family of so-and-so (i.e., Abu Talib) are not my supporters. My supporter is Allah and the righteous believing people. But they (that family) have kinship (Rahm) with whom I will maintain good the ties of kinship”.
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

331. Abu Ayyub Khalid bin Zaid Al-Ansari (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: A man came to Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) and said, “Direct me to a deed which will admit me to Jannah and take me away from the Fire”. The Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, “Worship Allah and associate no partner with Him, perform As-Salat, pay Zakat, and maintain the ties of kinship”.
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

332. Salman bin `Amir (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: The Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, “When you break fast, you should do it with a date-fruit for there is blessing in it, and if you do not find a date-fruit, break it with water for it is pure.” Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) added: “Charity towards a poor person is charity, and towards a relation is both charity and maintaining the ties (of kinship)”.
[Tirmidhi].

333. Ibn `Umar (May Allah be pleased with them) reported: I had a wife whom I loved but `Umar (May Allah be pleased with him) disliked her. He asked me to divorce her and when I refused, `Umar (May Allah be pleased with him) went to Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) and mentioned the matter to him. Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) asked me to divorce her.
[At-Tirmidhi and Abu Dawud].

334. Abud-Darda’ (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: A man came to me and said, “I have a wife whom my mother commands me to divorce”. I replied him that I had heard Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) saying, “A parent is the best of the gates of Jannah; so if you wish, keep to the gate, or lose it.”
[At-Tirmidhi and Ibn Majah].

335. Al-Bara’ bin `Azib (May Allah be pleased with them) reported: I heard the Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) saying: “A mother’s sister is equivalent to (real) mother (in status)”.
[At-Tirmidhi]